笑话网一、英语幽默故事精选
1、One day after school the teacher said to his students，“Tomorrow morning，if any one of you can answer my first question．I’ll permit him or her to go home earlier．” The next day，when the teacher came into the classroom，he found the blackboard daubed．He was very angry and asked，“Who did it？Please stand up! ” “It’ s me，”said Bob，“Now，I can go home，Good－bye，Sir! ”
一天，放学以后，老师对他的学生们说：“明天上午，如果你们当中的任何一个同学能回答我的第一个问题，我就准许他或她最先回家。”第二天，老师走进教室时发现黑板已被乱涂，他非常生气地问：“谁涂的？ 请站起来。”鲍勃说：“先生，是我，现在我可以回家了，再见。”
2、It was local election time and the candidate was visiting all the houses in his area.
At one house a small boy answered the door. “Tell me, young man,” said the politician. “Is your Mommy in the Republican Party or the Democratic Party?”
“Neither,” said the child, “she’s in the bathroom.”
正值当地竞选时期，候选人到他的区域的千家万户登门拜访。 候选人来到了一家门口，一个小男孩开了门。“告诉我，年轻人，”候选人问道，“你母亲是在共和党还是在民主党？” “都不是，”孩子答到，“她在浴室。”
3、The family seated in a restaurant had finished their dinner when Father Called over the waiter.
“My son has left quite a lot of meat on his plate,” explained Father, “Could you give me a bag so that I can take it home for the dog?”
“Gosh, Dad!” exclaimed the excited boy. “Have we got a dog then?”
一家人在饭馆里吃过晚饭，父亲把服务生叫了过来。
”先生，什么事？“服务生问。
”我儿子的盘子里剩下许多肉，“父亲说，”能给我们一个袋子吗？我把剩下的东西带回去喂狗。“
”啊呀，爸爸！“儿子激动地叫喊着。”咱家养狗了吗？“
二、英语幽默故事推荐
1、Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, “What happened?”
“A kid bit me,” replied Ivan.
“Would you recognize him if you saw him again?” asked his mother.
“I’d know him any where,” said Ivan. “I have his ear in my pocket.”
伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。他妈妈问，“发生了什么事？”
“一个男孩咬了我一口，”伊凡说。
“再见到他你能认出来吗？”妈妈问。
“他走到哪里我都能认出他，”伊凡说。“他的耳朵还在我衣兜里呢。”
2、When my son was a hign-school sophomore, he got a part-time job sacking groceries at a supermarket. He came home all smiles.
“How was your first day?” I asked.
“It was great, Dad,” he replied. “I got to talk to some good-looking girls.”
Since Stephen is not very talkative, I asked, “What did you say to them?”
“Do you prefer paper or plastic?”
我儿子在一所中学读二年级时，在一家超级市场找到了一份包装商品的业余工作。他满面笑容地回到了家。
“第一天感觉如何？”我问。
“好极了，爸爸。”他答道，“我跟许多漂亮的女孩子讲了话。”
由于斯蒂芬不善言谈，我问道：“你跟他们说了些什么？”
“你是喜欢纸包装还是塑料包装？”
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