一、英语短笑话精选
1、Father: Well, Tom, I asked to your teacher today, and now I want to ask you a question. Who is the laziest person in your class?
Tom: I don’t know, father.
Father: Oh, yes, you do! Think! When other boys and girls are doing and writing, who sits in the class and only watches how other people work?
Tom: Our teacher, father.
父亲:哎,汤姆,今天我跟你们老师谈过,现在我想问你个问题。你们班上谁最懒?
汤姆:我不知道,爸爸。
父亲:啊,不对,你知道!想想看,当别的孩子们都在做作业、写字时,谁在课堂上坐着,只是看人家做功课?
汤姆:我们老师,爸爸。
2、On my first day of classes at my university I took a front-row seat in my literature course. The professor told us we would be responsible for reading five books, and that he would provide us with a list of authors from which we could choose. Then he ambled over to the lectern, took out his class book and began, “Baker, Black, Brooks, Carter, Cook…” I was working feverishly to get down all the names when I felt a tap on my shoulder. The student in back of me whispered, “He’s taking attendance.
大学的第一天,文学课我坐在了前排。教授告诉我们这学期必须得读五本书,他提供我们可供选择的作者名单。随后他缓步走上讲台,拿出课本,“贝克、布莱克、布鲁斯、卡特、库克…”为了写下所有的名字,我不得不疯狂的作着记录。这时有人轻轻的拍我肩膀,坐在我后面的学生悄悄告诉我:“他在点名呢。”
3、When my son was a hign-school sophomore, he got a part-time job sacking groceries at a supermarket. He came home all smiles.
“How was your first day?” I asked.
“It was great, Dad,” he replied. “I got to talk to some good-looking girls.”
Since Stephen is not very talkative, I asked, “What did you say to them?”
“Do you prefer paper or plastic?”
我儿子在一所中学读二年级时,在一家超级市场找到了一份包装商品的业余工作。他满面笑容地回到了家。
“第一天感觉如何?”我问。
“好极了,爸爸。”他答道,“我跟许多漂亮的女孩子讲了话。”
由于斯蒂芬不善言谈,我问道:“你跟他们说了些什么?”
“你是喜欢纸包装还是塑料包装?”
二、英语短笑话推荐
1、George asked the once wellknown wit, Horne Tooke,whether he could play cards.Your Majesty, replied Tooke, I am a mere childwhere cards are concerned. I cannot even tell a King from a Knave.
乔治三世问一度大名鼎鼎的才子霍恩·图克,会不会玩纸牌。 陛下,图克回答说:在玩纸牌方面,我只不过是幼儿园的水平。我甚至分不清国王和无赖。
2、Mike was late for school. He said to his teacher, Mr. Black, “Excuse me for my coming late, sir. I watched a football match in my dream.”
“Why did it make you late?” inquired the teacher.
“Because neither team could win the game, so it lasted a long time.” replied Mike.
麦克上学迟到了。他对布莱克老师说:“对不起,老师,今天早上我迟到了。因为我在梦里观看了一场球赛。”
么它会让你迟到呢?”老师问道。这都有能力获胜,所以就持续的时间长了。”麦克回答说。
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